Life

 Life is not about the end of the story where you put down the book with a satisfied sigh.  It is about all the chapters in between that make your heart race, bring a smile, and make you cry as you work your way deliciously exhausted to the end where you get to say,"That was a great story!"  

Suboxone Changed My Life   

My name is Tammy. I am a thirty-one year old mother and wife. I have two beautiful children, both boys, ages nine and four. They are everything to me. I have a wonderful, loving, and most important, an understanding husband.

I wanted to take the time to share with you about my battle with opiate addiction and the amazing journey I am now on as I travel the road to recovery.

I was twenty-seven years old when it all began.  I already had a history of drug abuse, experimenting with various drugs.  I had just delivered my second son. When the Doctor discharged me from the hospital, he sent me home with a large bottle of pain pills.  At the time, I was not familiar with the effects of opiates but quickly learned I was going to like them alot!  It wasn't long before they became my very best friend. I could depend on them and they never let me down.  I didn't do anything without them. 

I began to doctor shop in order to feed my addiction and found out I was very good  at obtaining what I wanted.  The doctors seemed very eager to prescribe them. I thought I had found what I had always been looking for. However, over the next few years I would come to the realization what I had thought was my best friend, had in fact, turned out to be my worst enemy.

I turned into a person I hardly knew and certainly did not respect and the monkey on my back was constantly with me. I spent the last year and a half searching for a way out.  If I could just stop using? If there was a way I could get the monkey off my back?  

I was hospitalized in a Residential In-patient Rehabilitation Center.  They removed the medications from my system by detoxification, but I was back to using shortly after being discharged. I attended outpatient therapy to no avail.  I went to Narcotics Anonymous meetings but nothing seemed to stop my cravings. My situation was becoming more desperate by the minute.  I needed help, but where was I going to find it? 

I turned to the Internet hoping to find some answers . After doing considerable research I stumbled upon a fairly new medication called Suboxone. Next, I located a physician in my area "Certified" to prescribe Suboxone and secured an appointment with him the next day to discuss Suboxone and how it worked. I went to bed feeling a sense of accomplishment.

The day came and I could hardly wait. Thoughts continued to race back and forth through my head. Would the medication work? What if it didn't work? What was I going to do?  I decided, after listening to the doctor,I would certainly like to give it try.  He sent me home with a weeks supply of medication and I have been  riding on "Cloud Nine"  since then.

I can honestly say Suboxone saved my life. I have been opiate-free twenty-six days and I am loving it. I never thought I would ever be at a point in my life where I could honestly say, "I am confident in what lies ahead for me and my family."   The most amazing part is my children have their Mother back and my husband has his wife. I am back to the person I was before opiates, only better. 

I can't tell you how fulfilling it is to do things for my children and enjoy them.  I even look forward to football practice, football games, dates with my husband and no more complaining, even about household chores. It is a complete joy waking up every morning.  

If you are out there looking for an answer, like I was, Suboxone is it. There is no need to struggle, there is light at the end of the tunnel. Suboxone saved my life and it can do the same for you.  Thanks for allowing me to share my story.

                                                                                   Tammy Wilson

          Spiritual Awakening      

On June 14th 2007, I entered treatment/rehabilitation for the fifth time in twelve months. I was in total despair and wanted to die.  I literally was trying to figure out how to kill myself. I had abused many drugs, but especially opiates, hard, for the past ten years. I had completely lost all hope and the will to live.  

I read a pamphlet on Suboxone, and asked about it and was put on it.  When I woke up the next morning,  Sunday, I felt,  overnight, I had a full-blown spiritual  awakening. I believe the Suboxone freed up my mind enough from the obsession and cravings I discovered a little hope and ran with it. 

Over the next few days, I realized  that my life had turned completely around.  Worry and fear were almost gone and for the first time in years I was able to smile. The Suboxone did NOT make me high, it just made me feel normal, or at least how I think normal would feel. I finally understood how to make a program work.

For the first time I ever, I was actually feeling the AA promises coming true and I had barely even started working the program.  I felt freedom, happiness and true serenity.  Everyone around me couldn't believe the change and it inspired them that there was hope for them. Suboxone truly saved my life and pulled me back from the brink of death. 

It's been over three weeks now and I go to meetings almost every day.  I'm making new friends and the old friends I've had during my repeated failed recovery attempts can't believe how different I am and look.  Suboxone has been an absolute miracle. 

I have no plans to stay on it forever, but I am going to stay on it for months and then slowly wean myself off taking my time.  I can't afford to go back and relapse or I will die.  Suboxone has enabled me to free my mind enough to actually work a program of recovery without having cravings for drugs and/or even cravings for more Suboxone, which in itself is a minor miracle.  

I would highly recommend Suboxone to anyone who previously has tried to stop using opiates, but continuously had problems relapsing. Give it a chance?  You won't regret it and what is it you have to lose?  

Mark Hilton

Editor: Deborah Shrira                     Dated: October 31, 2007